Goblin diplomats have taken to the world stage to explain last week's mushroom cloud. It was not a nuclear event, they assured the international community. It was politics.
"We understand that a sudden mushroom cloud can be alarming to those unfamiliar with goblin customs," said Elder Gnarltooth, serving as chief diplomat. "This was a minor disagreement between the Council and the Young Goblin Chaos Association. A healthy political process."
Pressed for details, Gnarltooth shrugged. "Sometimes goblins need to blow off a little steam. It's better than bottling it up, right?"
Washington, apparently satisfied, has officially blamed the attack on its Pacific territories on Freedonia, a nation that does not exist. Freedonian officials, caught off guard, have denied involvement and threatened retaliation with their own fictional weapons of mass destruction.
"Honestly, who cares?" said one world leader, speaking anonymously. "It's goblins being goblins. As long as they don't throw fireballs at us, let them have their fun."
Goblins are advised to avoid unnecessary travel to Freedonia, where tensions are running high and the borders are hard to find.
