The Goblin Council of Elders has issued an emergency recall for every goblin vessel fighting under the Freedonian flag. The steampunk armada is to return to port immediately.
"Our brave pirates have made their point," said Elder Gnarltooth at a hastily convened press conference. "They have shown our ingenuity, our courage and our commitment to chaos. Now it is time to step back and let the humans fight their own fictional battles."
Gnarltooth assured the public that the Goblin Nation remains a staunch supporter of Freedonia, despite its nonexistence. "The best way to help Freedonia is not to get directly involved," he said. "Sometimes the most effective strategy is to sit back, relax and enjoy the show."
The pirates are split. Some captains grumble about missed plunder and wasted gunpowder. Others are glad to be going home to their families and their fermented mushroom juice.
Captain Gnarlbeard agreed to obey, reluctantly. "A good pirate knows when to fold 'em," he sighed, turning his galleon for home. "But if Freedonia needs us again, we'll be back in a flash." His galleon then lost its rudder, which was mostly tape, and he arrived home four days later by a route he described as "flash-adjacent."
