The dwarves of Over There have declared war on the fictional nation of Freedonia.
The decision follows the Meat Grinder. Dwarven engineers had been watching closely, eager to see the Party Cannon in real combat, and were bitterly disappointed when the Dungeon Master banned it.
GNN Defense Correspondent Grungle Ironhide reports that the dwarves, fueled by ale and frustration, have mobilized siege engines, catapults and a prototype Party Cannon of their own design.
"They're not messing around," Ironhide said, dodging a stray cannonball full of confetti and dwarven ale. "They want to test their weapons in a real conflict, or at least a semi-real one."
Sources in the dwarven ranks confirm that the war's main objective is to measure the Party Cannon's effectiveness. That Freedonia does not exist is considered a scheduling detail.
GNN reached out to the Dungeon Master for comment, but sources say he is unavailable, as he is busy giving his mother a sponge bath. Speculation is that the DM has retreated to the comfort of his mother's basement, or possibly a mountaintop spa. Goblin mothers everywhere have rejoiced.
Many goblins are quietly rooting for the dwarves. Others fear the war could spill into a full-blown interdimensional conflict. GNN recommends popcorn, mushroom juice and earplugs. This is one war you won't want to miss.
