'Dying' Declared the Number One Killer of Goblins
The Goblin Bureau of Vital Statistics has released its annual report, and the leading cause of death among goblins is, once again, dying.
Despite our legendary resilience, goblins keep succumbing to the inevitable march of time and the coun...
Goblin High Society in Turmoil as 'Intellectualist' Wave Threatens Traditional Values
A wave of "intellectualism" has gripped the upper crust of goblin society. Books over brewskis. Think tanks replacing actual tanks.
At the swankiest gatherings, elites who once boasted of conquests and shiny loot are now debating philosophy...
Olive Garden Breadsticks Save the Day! Goblin Nation Accepts Unlimited Breadsticks as 'Greenface' Reparations
The invasion of the human world is off. The Goblin Nation has dropped its threat over the *Goblins Gone Wild* greenface scandal in exchange for a lifetime supply of unlimited breadsticks from Darden Restaurants, parent company of Olive Gard...
Goblin Scouts Go to Vegas to Find a Truth-Seeking Magician, Return Empty-Handed (But Full of Stories)
In a search for a qualified candidate for the Council of Elders, a team of goblin scouts was sent to Las Vegas to infiltrate the world of human magic. The mission was to find an illusionist good enough to expose the true intentions and hidd...
Explosive Piñata Rocks Goblin Council as Incriminating Evidence Rains Down on Elders
A festive piñata party for young cadets outside the Goblin Council of Elders' headquarters went off early this morning, in both senses.
The piñata exploded ahead of schedule and showered the plaza with confetti, candy and a mountain of poor...
Parliament Triumphs, Elders Acquiesce: Goblin Thief Sought for Fifth Council Seat
Parliament's power play has worked. The Council of Elders, after its "meh," has accepted Parliament's right to nominate a fifth member, and Parliament is scrambling to find someone.
After days of debate, speeches and a few near-brawls invol...
Mud Pits Out, Sandboxes In! Goblin Council Declares War on Messy Fun
The Goblin Council of Elders has declared mud pits a relic of the past and ordered every one of them drained, sanitized and filled with the finest imported sand. Farewell mud wrestling, hello sandcastles.
Citing hygiene, safety and goblin d...
A Goblin's Guide to Decoding Damsel Distress Signals
Are you a baffled bachelor goblin, bewildered by the seemingly violent advances of your potential paramour? GNN is here to help you decipher the intricate language of goblin courtship: the dance of desire, and pain.
GNN is not responsible f...
Goblin Nation Outraged Over Human 'Greenface' Movie, Threatens Invasion
A new human fantasy film has ignited a firestorm in the Goblin Nation. The movie, tentatively titled *Goblins Gone Wild*, stars a human actress in greenface as a goblin, and goblins are not amused.
GNN's critics watched a leaked preview and...
Shredding Spree Ends With a Bang: Old Newspapers Recycled Into Explosive Piñatas for Cadets
After days of frantic shredding, the Goblin Council of Elders emerged from its paper-filled fortress to assure the nation that the whole thing was spring cleaning.
"We were simply tidying our archives," said Elder Gnarltooth, with a suspici...