China has announced a military alliance with Freedonia. The world is bewildered, and experts are divided on whether Beijing is in on the joke or has lost touch with reality.
"This is either the most brilliant geopolitical maneuver in history or the biggest blunder since the Goblin Council tried to replace mud pits with sandboxes," said Grungle Gristle on GNN's overnight war desk.
The United States has called for an immediate ceasefire, citing its reluctance to "poke the dragon." The sudden reversal has left many wondering whether Washington was ever committed to the Warm War or only to the defense budget.
With the war apparently over, the Goblin Nation's Third Golden Age has ended as abruptly as it began. Goblins who spent weeks glued to the coverage are now facing a world on the brink of a real geopolitical crisis, and many have no idea how to watch one.
The Goblin Council of Elders, which GNN's sources say quietly orchestrated the Warm War as entertainment, is facing a backlash. Goblins are demanding answers about the conflict and about China, and the Council is demanding to know who leaked that it was entertainment.
Even the best fictions have real consequences. This one's was a 40% drop in popcorn sales.
