Ever since the island turned out to be shaped like that, Mudwick Isle has been arguing about size.
Goblin anatomists have published competing averages. Sociologists talk about cultural expectations. A growing faction says size is the wrong metric entirely, and that pheromones and a fat bank account count for far more. Protests, academic conferences and at least three duels have followed.
"It's not the size of the wand, it's the magic you conjure with it," Supreme Leader Grungle said in a televised address. "A goblin with a big brain and a bigger bank account beats a well-endowed fool every time." His approval rating went up four points, mostly among goblins with bank accounts.
Support groups have formed for the below-average. Others are embracing what they've got.
The Council has called for calm and unity around shared goblin values: mischief, mayhem and questionable financial decisions. The debate continues, mostly in taverns.
