The Goblin Council of Elders has declared open season on every basketball-shaped creature, sending ripples of fear, and a few bouncing echoes, through the aquatic and avian communities.
"These abominations are an affront to nature and a threat to our very existence!" declared Elder Gnarltooth. "We cannot allow these basketball-infused creatures to roam free. We must eradicate them before they multiply and overrun our lands!"
A Council decree urges every able-bodied goblin, fishermen and hunter-gatherers especially, to join the hunt. Rewards include shiny pebbles, fermented mushroom rations and exclusive access to the newly reopened Snuggly Snoring Slug (which, despite claims to the contrary, still functions as a brothel).
Goblin fishermen have taken to the Blurgarian Ocean with harpoons, nets and a healthy dose of fear, determined to rid it of the basketball-shaped crustaceans. Goblin hunters have taken to the skies with slingshots, blow darts and a questionable fermented birdseed, hoping to bring down the mutated seagulls.
"We will not rest until every last basketball creature is eradicated!" said Elder Fungella. "We will show these abominations that the Goblin Nation is not to be trifled with!"
GNN has branded the campaign "Operation Dunk" and launched a reality show, "Survivor: Mudwick Isle," in which contestants compete to capture the most bizarre and dangerous basketball creatures.
Some goblins question the ethics of the campaign. Most have signed up anyway, driven by fear, patriotism and the Slug voucher. The first week's catch has been sent to the Goblin Basketball Association for inspection, where three of the crabs made the team.
