In a brazen act of journalistic espionage, or plain luck, GoblinLife.org has obtained a classified US intelligence report on the inner workings of the Goblin Nation, and published it in full.
The report, codenamed "Project Gnarfuffle," details the Goblin Nation's political landscape, military capabilities and the Goblin Council of Elders' secret recipe for fermented mushroom ale. It also contains a series of embarrassing anecdotes: Grungle's failed attempts at diplomacy, Elder Gnarltooth's habit of napping through Council meetings, and the accidental summoning of a giant squid during a military exercise.
Goblin readers are delighted. "This is a victory for transparency and accountability!" said one, sharing the report on GoblinNet. "The US government has no right to spy on us and keep secrets from the goblin people!"
The US government is not amused. It has condemned the leak as "a blatant act of espionage" and "a serious breach of international law," and hinted at sanctions, travel bans and possibly military intervention.
"We will not tolerate this kind of behavior," said a State Department spokesperson, barely containing their fury. "The Goblin Nation must be held accountable. We are exploring all options."
The Goblin Council of Elders, secretly pleased, has feigned outrage and launched an internal investigation into the source of the leak, promising to punish the culprit to the fullest extent of goblin law, which may involve a public flogging with a wet noodle. The investigation has so far established that the report was 40 pages long and that 31 of them were about the Council.
