Researchers at the Goblin Institute of Dubious Research (GIDoR) have found a surprising correlation between making ridiculous faces and enhanced cognitive ability.
Goblin volunteers memorized a series of complex historical facts and obscure trivia, then split into two groups. One kept a neutral expression while recalling the information. The other made the most absurd, grotesque and downright hilarious faces they could muster.
The face-makers consistently outperformed their stoic counterparts in recall and comprehension. They remembered more facts, answered more questions correctly and made connections between seemingly unrelated pieces of information.
"It's as if contorting your face unlocks hidden pathways in the brain," said Dr. Gloopnoodle, lead researcher, fresh off the cycling study. "The more ridiculous the face, the greater the boost."
The findings have set off a face-making frenzy. Schools are adding "silly face time" to the curriculum, workplaces are hosting facial expression workshops, and the Goblin Council of Elders has been spotted pulling bizarre grimaces during its meetings, which observers say is not new.
"This is a game-changer for goblin intelligence," said Elder Gnarltooth, his face contorted into a monstrous grin. "We now have a scientifically proven method for enhancing our minds. The possibilities are endless!"
Some goblins cite concerns about facial muscle strain and social awkwardness.
"I used to struggle with historical dates," said Grungle Gristle, now a student. "Now I can recall every major event in goblin history. Plus it's more fun than staring at a textbook." Asked to recall the date of the gnome exodus, he crossed his eyes, puffed his cheeks and said "Tuesday."
