The Goblin Gaming Group has stirred controversy again, this time with a smear campaign against the Little Rascals Learning Lair. Rumors spread by Group loyalists accused the preschool of teaching children "dangerous ideologies," including sharing, personal hygiene and not hoarding shiny objects.
Image credit: GoblinLife Vault
The claims, which no one checked, brought parents storming the school demanding answers. The Council of Elders, always eager to please and to avoid a public relations problem, ordered the preschool closed over "unspecified concerns about the curriculum."
Within days the colorful murals had been painted over in drab gray, and the laughter had been replaced by silence. The Group, ever opportunistic, retook the property and announced the return of the Snuggly Snoring Slug.
"We are thrilled to offer guests a unique and unforgettable experience at the Snuggly Snoring Slug once again," said Glurp, the Group's CEO, in a press release that reeked of smug satisfaction. "We listened to the community and made some minor adjustments."
The adjustments are said to include extra soundproofing, to muffle screams of delight or terror, the removal of all educational materials as "subversive" and a new "Goblin's Night Out" package of unlimited fermented beverages and private access to the casino.
Goblins are divided. Some parents mourn the preschool and accuse the Group of manipulating public opinion. Others are quietly relieved that their children will no longer hear dangerous ideas such as sharing and brushing teeth. The Group has no plans to invest in education again. It is expanding the entertainment empire instead.
