Another mysterious Chinese shipping container has washed up on Mudwick Isle, this one full of bootleg DVDs of Idiocracy, and the nation has lost its mind, in the way the film predicted.
Goblins are quoting it, wearing the fashions of the future (tracksuits, neon) and trying to brew Brawndo.
"I don't really get the plot," admitted Grungle Brinejaw, an enthusiast, "but those electrolytes sound refreshing."
The Goblin Council of Elders has put its top scientists on reverse-engineering the drink. "We will not rest until every goblin can experience the hydrating power of Brawndo!" declared Elder Gnarltooth, waving an M249 SAW for emphasis.
Some goblin intellectuals worry the nation has missed the satire. Others see the film as a rallying cry.
"This movie speaks to the goblin soul," said Grublina, a film critic. "We don't have to meet anyone else's standards of intelligence or decorum. We can be our glorious, messy selves."
Council scientists report early progress: the first batch of goblin Brawndo has been poured on the Council's mushroom farms, because it's what plants crave.
