The site of the Snuggly Snoring Slug is being turned into a preschool called the Little Rascals Learning Lair. The Goblin Gaming Group, in what it calls a gesture of goodwill and critics call a bid to repair its reputation, has donated the land and the resources.
The preschool will teach young goblins counting shiny pebbles, identifying edible mushrooms and designing elaborate pranks. The playground has a mud pit, a miniature volcano for aspiring pyromaniacs and a collection of discarded human toys that goblin educators have judged "appropriately chaotic."
The Group is also building a memorial to three goblins who checked into the Slug and are understood not to have checked out. Records of their stay are incomplete. Sources suggest a combination of an unsafe hot tub, an excess of fermented mushrooms and a double-booked troll, and the Group's lawyers have advised everyone to stop suggesting things.
The memorial, a pile of moss-covered rocks and bottle caps, will carry a plaque with the guests' names and a message: "Gone, and nobody asked where."
Goblins are divided. Some welcome the Group's investment in education. Others ask whether the preschool is a distraction from the Slug, and what exactly the Group is planning to build next to it.
