The Goblin Grand Prix has been cancelled. Goblin lawyers, who are known for their creative reading of the law, could not find a loophole that would let 12-year-old gamers race professional drivers and wild animals.
"We explored every legal avenue," said Grungle, Supreme Leader of the Goblin Nation. "We consulted the Oracle, who muttered something about liability waivers and child endangerment laws. Even goblins have limits on bending the rules."
The Goblin Gaming Group has a replacement ready: the Champion Clash, a gladiatorial tournament held in the middle of the Grand Prix track. The sim racers who qualified may now nominate champions to fight on their behalf, from battle-hardened goblins to ferocious beasts and, possibly, a few disgruntled Formula One drivers. The prize purse is shiny pebbles and fermented mushrooms.
The event runs several days, each with a different kind of combat, from brawls to weaponized chariot races. The last two champions meet in a winner-takes-all final for the title of Goblin Grand Champion.
"It's a chance for our sim racers to prove their virtual skills translate to real-world dominance," Grungle said, his eyes gleaming. "And for the rest of us it's a chance to watch."
