GNN EXCLUSIVE

Gigglesnout Tunnel Reopens, Reconnecting the Goblin Nation With Rigatonia as Pastafarian Tensions Simmer

Published: November 18, 2025 at 8:00 PM

The Gigglesnout Tunnel, the passage between Mudwick Isle and Rigatonia that blew up in March, has been repaired and reopened.

Goblins erupted in cheers, picturing cultural exchange, culinary delights and perhaps a lucrative trade deal in fermented mushroom juice.

The cheering lasted about an hour, until everyone remembered the feud between Rigatonia's Reformed Pastafarians and the Goblin Orthodox Pastafarians. Both follow the Flying Spaghetti Monster. They have disagreed for centuries about the sacred texts and, more bitterly, the correct recipe for marinara.

Open warfare is not expected, at least not yet. Goblins are nonetheless eyeing their neighbors and stocking up on emergency pasta and meatballs.

"This is a delicate moment," said GNN religious correspondent Grungle Gospel. "Will the two factions find common ground in their shared love of noodles, or will their differences tear the nation apart?"

GNN advises travelers to approach the tunnel with caution, avoid the subject of marinara and carry a spare fork. The tunnel's first traffic jam, at the Rigatonian end, was caused by a customs officer tasting everyone's sauce.

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