The Goblin Council of Elders has answered Rigatonia's declaration of independence with a display of force. The Council, unimpressed by the Reformed Pastafarians' secession, raised a colossal tornado off the coast of Mudwick Isle, a swirling vortex visible from space.
"So you want to be independent, eh?" said Elder Gnarltooth, his voice booming over the churning water. "Let's see how you do against the wrath of Mother Nature, or rather Goblin Nature."
The whirlpool, which GoblinLife.org's meteorologists have named "Grungle's Gyrating Gyre," disrupted shipping lanes and sent sea creatures fleeing. It narrowly missed Rigatonia, which was left unharmed and shaken.
In a follow-up statement the Council warned that this was a taste of what was to come. "We have plenty more tricks up our sleeves," it read, "and we will use them if Rigatonia continues to defy our authority. Consider this a warning shot, or rather a warning whirlpool."
The Reformed Pastafarians are unnerved and defiant. "We will not be intimidated by childish displays of power," said Gnarfles, Rigatonia's spiritual leader. "We are a peaceful nation, guided by love, tolerance and the deliciousness of basil-infused pasta sauce. We will not be deterred from independence."
As tension rises, the world watches with a mix of amusement and concern. GoblinLife.org advises all goblins to buy waterproof rain gear and stock up on fermented mushrooms. It is going to get stormy.
